Easy Being Green: Homemade Pesto Rolls

I like green. I have a bright lime green cardigan. Seriously, who has a incandescent neon green sweater? Oh yeah.

I do.

And sometimes I sport it with my key lime green earrings. Or Kelly green nail polish. The two times I painted my bedroom when I was a teenager: green.
I especially like green food. My favorite apples are the green ones. I nearly always order salads when I am at a restaurant. Avacados? Yes.
You get the point.

So given my love for the verde, you would assume that I would be the number one advocate for Pesto. It's the greenest of greenies. I mean, it's a paste.
Made of plants. Really green plants.

But for some reason I can't explain, I've never been able to appreciate Pesto. I really don't know why. It definitely isn't for lack of trying. Whenever I see it my little brain goes: "Oooo! Green food! How tasty. I'm sure I'll like it this time. It's so pretty...." I try it on pasta. I eat it on paninis. I buy it "fresh" from the produce section at the supermarket. Every time it's been a let down.

But, I had never made it before. It seemed like a lot of work for something I didn't enjoy too much. And it would dirty too many dishes, right? Most definitely.

When I had a party to cater recently, they asked for a few dozen pesto rolls to be included in the appetizers. I usually buy a nice container of the aforementioned "fresh" stuff at the nearest grocery store to save time. But for some unimaginable reason everyone was out of stock. Everybody had a pesto run or something and drained the Basil reservoirs. I must have missed the memo.
And thankfully, because it forced me to make my own. It was worth it. This pesto actually tasted good.
Wait.
It tasted awesome! I was ready to put it on noodles, on toast, in a tortilla, mixed with scrambled eggs. I was honestly preparing to pesto-ize the world in a big way.

But I just rolled it up in these crescents. Because that's what I said I would do. I'll to have schedule another day on the calendar to smother the world in pesto, I guess.
Now, I'm giving you this crescent roll recipe because I'm so excited to tell you all about my new found green favorite. But I'm definitely going to be tweaking and twisting this recipe. Because although the rolls were good, the process itself is hard to work with. The dough hardly rises the second time, and it takes for-ev-er. And the roll itself could be softer, more tender...
So take this recipe with a grain of salt. Ha! I'm hilarious. Since it kinda needs a little more salt. In the recipe? Get it? Yeah...

Homemade Pesto Rolls
Yields about 3 dozen
2 1/2 cups flour + 2 cups flour
1 1/2 TB active yeast
1 cup warm milk
3 eggs
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup shortening
2 tsp salt
Pesto for filling-recipe follows

Mix your flour and yeast together. In a saucepan heat milk, shortening, and salt on stove top til shortening is just melted. Let sit til the milk is warm to the touch, not hot. Add to the dry ingredients and add eggs. Beat on low with a hand mixer for 30 minutes and then 3 minutes on high. By hand stir in 2 cups of flour to form dough. Knead the dough until it is smooth (about 5-8 minutes) Place in a greased bowl and let rise in a warm place until doubled (2 hours at least) Punch down dough divide into three parts. Let rest for ten minutes. Roll each section in rectangles. Cut your rectangles into 12 triangles. Spread the pesto thinly on the triangles and roll up starting with the widest end. Place on a cooking sheet or baking stone and let rise again for at least an hour. Brush with milk and bake at 375 until golden brown. Brush hot rolls with melted butter and serve warm or at room temperature.

Homemade Pesto
2 packed cups of clean basil leaves
2 cloves garlic
1/4 cup of pine nuts or walnuts (I used pine nuts)
1/2 cup olive oil
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese

In a food processor pulse the basil leaves, pine nuts, and garlic cloves until coarsely chopped. Slowly add olive oil to mixture 1/4 cup at a time, processing until smooth. Season it with salt and pepper. Stir in the cheese. You can keep this in the refrigerator for about three days.

On the precipice of a craggy cliff....

I'm suspended over the edge, a strategically placed bloody cut above my perfectly shaped eyebrow...I am about to be thrown to my death by an ugly (or handsome, if you so choose) villain intent on my demise. 
"Now," he says with a smooth evil voice "I will put your pitiful life into your own hands to make this interesting." (He is a villain obsessed with the interesting...he strives always to be an imaginative antagonist, if nothing else) "If you can answer this one question correctly I will let you live. But God knows you never could...some say it is an impossible riddle that cannot be solved..." This is my cue to despair and his cue to chuckle terribly. His grip on my poor neck tightens and I squirm! My life is surely over...my enemy gives a wry slimy smile. "If you had to host the biggest and fanciest brunch known to all mankind for the most esteemed people of the world," a dramatic pause.... "what would you serve?"

GASP! The impossible question. I will die a horrible death miserably at the bottom of this rocky cannon! Andthe blackgaurd knows it; he laughs, preparing to hurl me to my end. I throw out the only answer that could even remotely be correct:
"Filled croissants!" 

And huzzah! The brute casts me aside and leaves with a swirl of his cloak and an evil rattle in his throat. The impossible riddle has been solved, the world is saved, and all is well. The good citizens will brunch another day!

Okay, joking aside...these filled croissants really are the perfect brunch/tea party/appetizer item you could ever serve.  Better yet, it doesn't take 12 hours like the traditional ones do. Really, I only took up one sunny afternoon making these flaky, buttery, rolls of awesome. 

You could make croissants without filling and they would be just as good. But when something can be filled, I fill it. I guess you could say that is a weakness of mine...every good heroine must have a weakness that isn't truly a weakness. 

Thus: two kinds of croissants here...mushroom bacon ones and nutella ones. Now, I'm  not a die hard nutella fan. I like the stuff with fruit and so we had a jar of it in the pantry, but I wouldn't go all hipster on you dear people and swear myself into the convent of the great nutella-cult or anything.  BUT! On these croissants...I would swear something, because it's the tastiest thing this side of doughnuts. 

And so...the recipe for the answer to the world's impossible riddle:

Life Saving Filled Croissants

• For Dough:
• 1 large egg plus enough warm water to make 1 cups of liquid 
• 2 Tablespoon sugar
• 3 cups Flour
• 1 teaspoons instant yeast
• 1/2 Tablespoon salt
• 1 tablespoons butter, melted

• For Butter:
• 1 cups butter, cool to the touch
• 1/4 cup Flour

For Fillings:

Nutella (5 Tablespoons)

or

5 large button mushrooms, chopped.

5 slices of bacon

1) For the dough: Make a sponge by cracking your egg into a 2-cup liquid measure and adding enough warm water to equal 1 cup. Beat with a whisk or fork until blended, and pour into a large mixing bowl. Add 1 tablespoon of the sugar, 1 1/2 cups of the flour, and the yeast. Mix until well blended. Cover and set aside.

2) For the butter: While the yeast begins its work, set up the butter that will be rolled into the dough. Mix the butter and 1/4 cup flour just until the mixture is smooth and well blended (no hard lumps). You can do this with a mixer, a food processor, or with a spoon, by hand. Be careful not to beat the mixture at high speed, you don't want to have any air. Lightly flour a piece of plastic wrap, place the butter mixture on it, and use a dough scraper or spatula to pat it into an 8-inch square. Wrap the butter and put it in the refrigerator on a flat surface for at least 30 minutes. You want to mix the butter with flour because this will prevent it from leaking out of you dough layers as you turn and roll later on in the process. 

3) Finish the dough: Stir the melted butter into the sponge. Whisk together the remaining 1 1/2 cups of the remaining flour, the rest of the sugar, and the salt. Add to the sponge and mix until you have a soft but kneadable dough, either by hand or in your mixer. Knead briefly ti lit sticks together nicely, adding more of the measured flour if the dough is still sticky. Don't knead too long (longer than 2-5 minutes) because it will over work the gluten and make it hard to roll out later. 

4) Once the dough is smooth and elastic, pat it into a square shape, wrap it loosely in plastic wrap and refrigerate it for 30 minutes. I put mine in the freezer for ten minutes and then the fridge for ten minutes more to speed up the process. 

5) Make your savory filling: Cook bacon slices in a frying pan til crisp. Remove and drain them on paper towels. In the bacon grease saute the mushrooms til soft. Crumble the bacon slices into the cooked mushrooms. Set aside until you are ready to fill the croissants. 

5) Rolling in: Remove the chilled dough from the refrigerator and put it on a lightly floured surface. Gently roll it into a square about 12 inches across. Unwrap the butter slab and place it in the center of the dough at a 45° angle, so it looks like a diamond in the square. ( I borrowed these images from kingarthurflour.com since I didn't take any pictures of my own while baking.) 

6) Fold the flaps of the dough over the edges of the butter until they meet in the middle. Pinch and seal the edges of the dough together; moisten your fingers with a little water, if necessary.

7) Dust the top with flour, then turn the dough over and tap it gently with the rolling pin into a rectangular shape. Pick up the dough to make sure it isn't sticking underneath, dusting under with more flour if necessary, (always more flour!) then roll from the center out until you have a rectangle 20 inches long by 10 inches wide.

8) When you've reached this size, take a dry brush and lightly sweep off any excess flour, then fold the bottom third of the dough up to the center, and the top third over that (like you would fold a letter). Line the edges up on top of each other, and even up the corners so they're directly on top of each other. This is your first "turn."

9) Turn the dough package 90° to the right, so it looks like a book ready to be opened. If the dough is still cool to the touch and relaxed, do another rolling and turning the same way. Make a note of how many folds you've completed and the time, and wrap the dough. Return it to the refrigerator for at least 20 minutes. Repeat the folding and turning process at least one more time, for a total of four turns. (I did five. The more you do the flakier the pastry will be.) Once completed, wrap the dough well and refrigerate it for at least an hour before using.

10) Shaping the croissants: Roll it to a 12" x 18" rectangle. Trim the edges of the dough on every edge. This cuts off the folded edges that would stop the "puff." Cut the dough in thirds lengthwise and in half through the middle. This will give you six 4" x 9" pieces. Cut each piece in half diagonally, and arrange them so the points of the triangles are facing away from you. It's okay to stretch them out a little to shape them when you do this. 

11) If you want to, this is the time to place a teaspoon of filling at the base of the triangle, or spread nutella on the whole triangle. Roll up the dough, starting with the wider edge and working toward the point. Make sure the point is tucked under the bottom of the croissant. If you have to stretch the dough a little to make that happen, it's okay. You can also use a drop of water on the tip to help it stay in place. Place the croissants on a lightly greased or parchment-lined baking sheet. You could freeze them  at this point if you need to make these ahead for your fancy tea party ;).

12) To bake the croissants: Take the croissants out of the refrigerator, and preheat the oven to 350°F. While the oven is heating, brush the tops of the croissants with an egg well-beaten with 1 tablespoon of water.

13) When the oven is hot, bake the croissants for 30 minutes. The croissants should be a deep golden brown, you don't want any raw dough in the center. Remove from the oven and cool on a rack. Eat as soon as they are cool enough to not burn your tongue. ;)

Impromptu Delicious

I (being human) love pasta.
The other day my sister had some friends over between the bewitching hours of noon and 2pm. This is a good time to be over at the Lango house because that means I can cook you lunch! Here is the best lunch type invention I created on Friday:

Impromptu Delicious Pasta
Some Pasta
Half a can of diced tomatoes
Finely chopped chives
Finely chopped parsley
Butter
Salt
Onion Powder
Clove of Garlic

Cook the pasta, drain it. Throw in some butter, let it melt. (mmmm) Throw in the rest of the ingredients mix it up and eat it! See how beautifully simple it is? It is impromptu, delicious, and awesome. If you omit the butter in order to b artery conscious, you can even refrigerate it and eat it cold. BOOYAH! You can even throw some black olives in there, that would be great too.
The highschoolers liked it. Even after the claimed they "weren't hungry" they ate the whole pot of it. (This is because it is impossible to refuse a dish with pasta and butter in it. It's scientifically proven.)